Kodomo no Omocha
by Quicksilver
Summary: A Suboshi reflection, death piece. Suboshi regrets nothing.


Kodomo no Omocha

Quicksilver's Quill Offers   
Kodomo no Omocha   
[mbsilvana@yahoo.com][1]   
standard disclaimers

I'm so scared, aniki. This wasn't suppose to happen. I'm not suppose to die. I'm only fifteen! I hurt so much...   
It saddens me. I've seen so much blood, been the cause of so much death. Honestly, though, I never wanted to hurt anyone. All I wanted was for you to be safe, and for Yui-sama to love me. Is that too much to ask for? Were my dreams such wild impossibilities?   
I'm not a bad guy- I'm sure you would agree. That is, if you could remember me. Now, though, I live with the knowledge that even if you could see me again, there would be no recognition in your gentle face. Only confusion at why we look so much alike, and who I was. I took away fifteen years from you, a sin that I will spend forever repenting, but I gave you something more. I gave you the peace you had always wanted.   
It's so pretty. Red... it's not my favorite color, but I could learn to like it. Red... the blood is so bright that it blinds me eyes as I cling to my chest, trying to hold on for just a little longer. Yui-sama needs me.   
You never met her. Ironic, isn't it? The two most important people to me never met each other- I'm sure you'd like her. She's smart, like you, though she does have a trace of the temper that's always cursed me. However, Yui-sama doesn't have the impulsiveness that's led me here, to this place, to this choice.   
I am alone. For the first time in my life, I am truly alone. There is no Yui-sama with me now to hold me and soothe my fears, and I cannot feel the bond that bound us tighter then anyone can every understand. When you were cut, I bled. When I was hurt, you shed the tears I was too stubborn to cry.   
Are we one person? I sometimes wondered. I don't want to know. For undoubtedly I would be the evil half, and that's something that no one wants to accept about themselves. Let us merely say we are the compliment to one another, and leave it at that. You possessed many virtues that I wished I had, but I was never jealous. Your achievements were my own.   
Tamahome is still alive. Damn it all- may Seiryuu someday catch him and flay him alive. No matter what I do, he always wins. He is the one who hurt Yui-sama, and together, with that stupid Suzaku no Miko, they must pay. I can't fight on anymore- and neither can any of the others. Soi is dead, Ashitare and Miboshi too. I killed Tomo to protect you, and then stole your memory to safeguard your future. So only Nakago and I remained, and I fear soon it will only be him. He frightens me.   
Strange. It hurts to breath.   
Do you remember when this whole thing began? I wish we could go back to that moment and warn our younger selves what we were getting into- that ultimately, the path of the Seiryuu seishi would separate us forever. I mourn for that time we laughed together, believing that we would protect our country in an honorable fashion.   
I hate the Suzaku Seishi, but you don't. You're too gentle for your own good. One thing I do credit them for is their loyalty- you'd never seen one of them killing their own. We did- it's in our natures, for Seiryuu is the God of War. I killed Tomo, and Nakago killed Ashitare. Frightening, ne? Our own worst enemies were ourselves.   
I'm calmer now.... me, the temperamental twin. Right now so much has become clear, as if the entire universe has focused on this moment, this instant, to bring complete clarity of thought to me...   
Aniki.... it's so warm. A loving light bathes me.... 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

A hand rested on the young boy's shoulder. He looked up, focusing his perfect blue-violet eyes on a face that was a mirror to his own. "What are you up to, Shun-chan?" the gentle voice asked.   
Shunkaku smiled at his twin brilliantly, tilting his head back with boyish eagerness. "Look!" he said with excitement in his voice. Between his hands spun a ryuuseisui, dancing with rapid speed..   
The other boy's eyes widened in respect. "How are you doing that?" he asked curiously.   
Shunkaku shrugged. "I don't know, aniki. It just seems to work." He grinned impishly and sent the ryuuseisui flying upwards, then winced as it started to plummet to the ground. "Gomen nasai," he apologized. "I still don't have perfect control over it."   
"Still, that looks like fun. Can you do it with anything else?"   
Shunkaku concentrated for a second, trying to levitate a few different objects that were nearby. "Iiee. But I'm sure I can learn- being able to float a ryuuseisui isn't that great a thing; it's just a child's toy, after all." 

END 

Note:   
Kodomo no Omocha is the name of my fav comedy anime series- which just happens to translate to mean "Child's Toy". Gotta love the irony.   
What's the ending scene for? You be the judge...   


   [1]: mailto:mbsilvana@yahoo.com



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